Episode 129
Notes
[Cue Episode Synth Voice]
[Cue extra lead-in “Galactically
Stupid”]
[Cue Intro]
Banter:
Hello everybody and welcome to the over-exposed, slightly offended,
culture-shock Daddycast!
Confused? You won’t be…here’s the deal. We went, the three of us, to one of those
big-box mega electronic stores (to return something, actually). But while we were there, of course, we could
hear every single TV, radio, boombox, anything that makes noise all squawking
at once in this cavern of a store. I
hope the employees get free Tylenol – the din was excruciating. And what should we hear as we walk by the
Satelite radio display on the way to the customer service desk? They had a live demo of their satellite radio
system going at about 110 decibels, and it was tuned to a hip-hop station which
was quite explicit…F-this and mother-F-that…so of course my son started singing
the song he just heard!
Figures. He is only 5, so he’s still in record mode,
picking up on anything he hears, and repeating it to see if he gets a
reaction. Well you betcha he got a
reaction…my wife was absolutely horrified that my son would hear this stuff in
a public place like this store – dare I say the store’s name – yes, I dare – BEST BUY – and then start signing away as if
it was A-OK. I was reminded of a story that
Paul of the Sippycups told me about his son, who started singing that Ramones
song “Let’s Get Sedated” at school – and got in trouble. They changed the lyrics for their stage
performances to “Let’s Get Elated”. I
could just imagine what kind of trouble my son would get into if he started
signing this garbage at school. I’m
thinking here comes trip number TWO to the principal’s office.
We made an
effort to explain to the manager why we thought this was a BAD IDEA to have
this stuff on full-blast, but the ‘manager’ didn’t look like he’d gone to the
senior prom just yet, so we had little faith that anything would change. They did turn the radio down and change the
station, the guy was nice enough and apologetic…but just to see if he really
meant what he said, we disappeared to the bookstore next door, and came back a
few minutes later, and presto! The foul
lyrics had returned. Not only that, but
on the VIDEO WALL was an R-rated sex scene in full cinematic action. Yeah, that instills faith in customer service
right there!
[Cue News_Theme]
Headlines:
Cocaine For “Sharing Time”, Kids Build Soybean-Fueled Race Car, Steroids Flip
The Angry Switch In Teens, Helping ADHD Kids Make New Friends, and more, after
this…
[Cue Alien Break 1]
[Cue PSA “Lalah Hathaway”]
March is
“Music In Our Schools Month”, and MENC’s mission is to advance music education
by encouraging the study and making of music by everyone. Please visit www dot menc dot org to find out
how you can help promote music education in your kids’ school. This has been a public service announcement
from 101 Uses for Baby Wipes and The National Association for Music Education.
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[Cue News_Bulletin]
[Cue Synth News Intro]
News:
NBC10 News
in
Bags Of
Cocaine Brought To Class By Second-Grader
Some
Children Taste White Substance
Police have
confirmed that a white substance found in 18 bags brought to a southwest
Parents
want to know if school officials are handling the situation properly.
At least
one child ingested some of the drugs and another child was taken to a hospital
late Tuesday afternoon to be checked out.
"I was
upset because they didn't call me and tell me what was going on," said
Shinette Brown, a parent of one of the students affected.
"My
daughter is scared to come to school," said Catalina Starling, a mother of
one of the students in the classroom.
Both
parents said that the drugs were passed around the classroom.
"I ate
it. I asked, 'What is it?' I spit it out and I was like, 'What is it?'"
said Shaniya Brown, 7.
"I
took her to the hospital because she said when they were in there, when she
took it, she started shaking and she couldn't stop shaking," a student's
mother said.
Starling's
daughter, Tracey, said that she passed up the bag given to her by a classmate.
"She
said that she got it from the girl ... and then she stuck one in my book
bag," Tracey Starling said.
Parents
told NBC 10 News that officials at the school had some of the second-graders
write out incident statements about what happened without their parents present
.
"They
know me at the school, that's why I don't understand why they even took a
statement without my knowledge," Catalina Starling said.
Late
Tuesday, school officials sent letters home to parents telling them that pink
bags with a powder-like statement from a student and that police were notified.
However, Police Commissioner Sylvester Johnson said that his department was not
notified until
School
officials have not made an official statement, but told NBC 10 News that they
are working on a timeline on how events transpired.
Parents
told NBC 10 News that they want to know why an ambulance was not called to the
school when the children ate the powder.
…Good
question, parents! Why WOULDN’T they at
least call the EMTs – who knows, the powder could’ve been RAT POISON! I only have this one story to judge, but it
sounds like the school administrators were more concerned with covering their
own butts than protecting the kids.
Having second graders write out statements? Huh?
Why?
But Wait –
There’s more…
Update to Cocaine Story…
On Monday,
a 7-year-old child at
"She
doesn't know where they came from," said the grandmother of the child who
passed out the packets.
NBC 10 News
is not identifying the name of the child involved or her grandmother.
After a
search warrant was served on the grandmother's southwest
"I
took her to school Monday morning. I checked the book bag, as I do every
morning. There was nothing in her book bag," the grandmother said.
In
But the
family of 7-year-old Shiniya Brown told NBC 10 News that the school dropped the
ball. They said they were never called after the girl ingested some of the
powdered cocaine.
"They
never called me. They never said anything about anything," said Shinetta
Brown, Shiniya's mother.
Vallas
insisted that the parents were called around
Catalina
Starling, the mother of 7-year-old Tracey Starling, was also upset Tuesday. She
said that Tracey was questioned and had to write an incident report without her
mother present.
"They
know me at the school, that's why I don't understand why they even took a statement
without my knowledge," Catalina Starling said.
"The
second graders are supposed to verbally explain what happened and they are
supposed to write out what happened. The question that parents should be
asking, what the entire community should be asking, is how a second grader gets
access to 12 bags of drugs," Vallas said.
Nobody has
been arrested. The case is still under investigation. None of the children
appeared to be injured in the incident.
…Thank the
maker nobody was hurt. The school got
very lucky. And yes, the parents should
be asking how a second-grader got the drugs!
But asking second graders to write STATEMENTS – what was the point in
THAT?
Something
smells, here. The grandmother says she
checked the backpack. Well, did the
grandma take the kid directly to school?
Where’s mom and dad?
Working? Selling drugs? I mean I’m certainly no expert in the drug
market, but 12 bags of cocaine sounds like a huge amount with a potentially
HIGH street value…where did it come from?
Gonna need to follow this one…
Kids Build Soybean-Fueled Car
The star at
last week's Philadelphia Auto Show wasn't a sports car or an economy car. It
was a sports-economy car — one that combines performance and practicality under
one hood.
The car that buyers have been waiting decades comes from an unexpected source
and runs on soybean bio-diesel fuel to boot.
A car that can go from zero to 60 in four seconds and get more than 50 miles to
the gallon would be enough to pique any driver's interest. So who do we have to
thank for it. Ford? GM?
The five kids, along with a handful of schoolmates, built the soybean-fueled
car as an after-school project. It took them more than a year — rummaging for
parts, configuring wires and learning as they went. As teacher Simon Hauger
notes, these kids weren't exactly the cream of the academic crop.
"We have a number of high school dropouts," he says. "We have a
number that have been removed for disciplinary reasons and they end up with
us."
One of the Fab Five, Kosi Harmon, was in a gang at his old school — and he was
a terrible student. The car project has changed all that.
"I was just getting by with the skin of my teeth, C's and D's," he
says. "I came here, and now I'm a straight-A student."
To Hauger, the soybean-powered car shows what kids — any kids — can do when
they get the chance.
"If you give kids that have been stereotyped as not being able to do
anything an opportunity to do something great, they'll step up," he says.
Stepping up is something the big automakers have yet to do. They're still in
the early stages of marketing hybrid cars while playing catch-up to the Bad
News Bears of auto shop.
"We made this work," says Hauger. "We're not geniuses. So why
aren't they doing it?"
Kosi thinks he knows why. The answer, he says, is the big oil companies.
"They're making billions upon billions of dollars," he says.
"And when this car sells, that'll go down — to low billions upon
billions."
…Good
job! Now these kids need to form a
corporation, patent all the ‘trade secrets’ they developed in this car and give
the automakers a run for their money!
This car sounds like a win-win; runs on biodiesel, sporty, gets 50 miles
per gallon, the exhaust smells like French fries, what’s not to love? I’d buy one.
Just one problem: keeping the GOVERNMENT out of the way. Here in
Still, it
sounds like one big achievement for these kids and their teacher. So kudos to them all, and just give me a call
when you have your first public offering, OK?
Anabolic Steroids Flip the
Adolescent Brain’s Switch for Aggressive Behavior (This is gonna get deep!)
Newswise —
Anabolic steroids not only make teens more aggressive, but may keep them that
way into young adulthood. The effect ultimately wears off but there may be other,
lasting consequences for the developing brain. These findings, published in
February’s Behavioral Neuroscience, also showed that aggression rose and fell
in synch with neurotransmitter levels in the brain’s aggression control region.
Behavioral Neuroscience is published by the American Psychological Association
(APA).
Neuroscientists
are deeply concerned about rising adolescent abuse of anabolic-androgenic
steroids (AASs), given the National Institute on Drug Abuse’s estimate that
nearly half a million eighth- and 10th-grade students abuse AASs each year. Not
only do steroids set kids up for heavier use of steroids and other drugs later
in life, but long-term users can suffer from mood swings, hallucinations and
paranoia; liver damage; high blood pressure; as well as increased risk of heart
disease, stroke and some types of cancer. Withdrawal often brings depression,
and recent research suggests that some AASs may even be habit-forming.
Overseen by
Richard Melloni Jr., PhD, of
However,
hamsters injected with commonly used steroids (suspended in oil) became
extremely aggressive. Even after the drug was withdrawn, the newly vicious
hamsters attacked, bit and chased the intruders. In fact, their aggressiveness
measured ten times greater than that of control hamsters injected with oil
only. Their full-blown aggression – clearly drug-induced -- lasted for nearly
two weeks of withdrawal, the equivalent of half their adolescence. Eventually,
the aggressiveness subsided; by three weeks of withdrawal, all the hamsters
greeted intruders with normal, playful defensiveness.
Autopsy
revealed that the outward aggressiveness correlated with inner changes in the
brain. When the drugged hamsters were hostile hosts, a part of their brains
called the anterior hypothalamus pumped out more of a neurotransmitter called
vasopressin. By three weeks of withdrawal, vasopressin levels subsided in
parallel with the aggressive behavior. The anterior hypothalamus regulates
aggression and social behavior. Thus, vasopressin – already known to stimulate
that area – appears to fuel the engine of aggression. And, says Melloni,
“Steroids step on the gas for agression.”
Thus, the
neuroscientists conclude that the aggressiveness triggered by anabolic
steroids, although reversible, may last long enough to create serious
behavioral problems for adults. Because this part of the rodent and human
nervous systems are similar, researchers generalize their findings to humans.
As a result, Melloni and his colleagues speculate that anabolic steroids can
dramatically shorten teenage fuses (not known for length under the best of
circumstances) and make young people “pop off” for years, a danger to
themselves and to others.
Melloni and
others researchers also are concerned that drug use during a critical window in
brain development can change their wiring for good. He says, “Because the
developing brain is more adaptable and pliable, steroids could change the
trajectory if administered during development.” His lab is releasing other new
findings, as yet unpublished, that the serotonin system – implicated in
depression – may never recover.
“If you hit
the right areas of the brain at the right time, you make permanent changes,”
Melloni concludes from the converging evidence. He hopes that adolescents don’t
take the ultimate recovery of the vasopressin system to mean it’s OK to use the
drugs. “It’s our hope that people considering the use of these drugs weigh the
long-term health risks and the serious potential for aggression and violence.
Muscle mass and medals aren’t worth the risk of hurting someone or landing in
jail.”
Finally,
researchers such as Melloni hope these new insights can lead to treatments for
aggressive behavior, with or without steroid abuse. “Linking aggression to
fluctuations in vasopressin makes it an important neurotransmitter to target
for pharmacotherapy,” he says.
Note:
Vasopressin, when released by the pituitary gland into the blood, is also known
as anti-diuretic hormone (ADH). The same molecule that regulates aggression and
social behavior when released in the brain also regulates the body’s water
balance when released into the bloodstream.
…Hamsters? We’re talkin’ hamsters here?! Ummm…hello?
How ‘bout a CLINICAL TRIAL before making the big leap? You’re gonna have a tough sell with teenagers
if your evidence is based on tests with hamsters! I’m not saying the research isn’t valid…but
c’mon! Steroid’s flip adolescent HAMSTER
switches…over-hyped headline I think…
Helping ADHD Kids Make Friends
Newswise —
Children with ADHD tend to have problems making friends because of symptoms
such as inattention, hyperactivity, aggression or difficulties controlling
their emotions. Univeristy of Alabama-Birmingham psychologist Sylvie Mrug,
Ph.D., said parents can take the following steps to help socialize their
children. “Find structured peer activities that emphasize cooperation rather
than competitiveness in areas the child enjoys, such as the scouts, sports
teams that aren’t too competitive or art classes. Make the adult leader aware
if the child needs frequent redirections or coaching. Organize play dates, but
invite just one child over and provide structured activities. Also, discuss and
role-play basic social skills such as conversations, making invitations over
the phone or conflict resolution.”
…All good
advice, but let’s face a cruel reality, shall we? Kids are going to have to compete – at some
point in their lives – for entry into College, jobs, raises…is it really a good
idea to keep kids with ADHD isolated from compettion, or is it better to TEACH
them how to handle their emotions while engaged in that competitive
activity. I’m asking – seriously! My son is VERY competitive, even with
me. Everything is a race, or a
challenge, or a battle, etc. So maybe my
5-yr-old is too competitive – I can’t say.
I don’t have a frame of reference.
His Kindergarten teacher says he’s doing fine, comparatively speaking,
so I’m OK with that. She sees him in a
social setting with kids his own age far more hours a week than I do.
Study: Teen girls drinking more soda
BETHESDA,
MD Feb. 25 -- Milk consumption is declining, while soda and fruit drinks are
increasing in popularity among adolescent girls, according to a study conducted
by researchers at the National Heart, Lung and Blood Institute in Bethesda,
Maryland. In a study of 2,371 girls ages nine through 19, researchers found
that milk consumption decreased by over 25% during the course of the study
while soda intake, on average, nearly tripled, becoming the number one beverage
consumed by older girls. According to study authors, sodas lack nutritional
value and are replacing beverages such as milk, which is an important source of
the calcium needed for good bone health. Also, girls who consumed the most soda
tended to be heavier than girls with lower soda intake. The authors suggest
that public health efforts are needed to aid adolescents in choosing healthier
beverages to help avoid calcium deficiencies and weight gain. This study was
published in the February issue of The Journal of Pediatrics.
…How about
packaging milk so it can be dispensed at a vending machine along with coke and
pepsi? This might be more of a sales and
marketing issue. More sodas yielding
heavier kids? Did they do studies about
DIET sodas? My wife is hooked on these
‘Jamba Juice’ drinks…y’know, smoothies served in a trendy storefront for
Starbuck’s coffee prices? More data,
please…
Girls 1; Abercrombie 0
Sometimes,
we have to rely on the teens to act like grown-ups. A group of Pennsylvania
girls, fed up with Abercrombie & Fitch T-shirts with demeaning slogans,
staged a "girlcott" last fall, asking girls around the country not to
wear shirts with sayings such as "Who needs brains when you have
these," or "I had a nightmare I was a brunette." In a shining
example of girl power, Abercrombie agreed to stop selling the T-shirts.
The girls,
members of a group called the Allegheny County Girls as Grantmakers, even got a
chance to meet with the retailer so they could pitch their own T-shirt designs
to company executives and managers.
Now
Abercrombie has released a new line of T-shirts with encouraging slogans, like
"Brunettes have brains" and "Blonde with a brain." While
the shirts are not what the girls pitched, they are a victory, grantmakers say.
"It's
a major, major accomplishment," one 16-year-old told the St. Petersburg
Times.
And perhaps
it is, for a company that courts controvery in its quest to stay cool among the
young and super-hip. Abercrombie once pulled a line of T-shirts in 2002 after
Asian American groups protested they reinforce negative stereotypes, and
recalled a racy catalogue in 2003 that bordered on pornography.
…So was
this a marketing ploy or were these girls really incensed enough to make a
difference? If this is a legit story, I
say, you go, GIRLS! Way to make a
difference! I hope that they’ll post a
web site with their t-shirt ideas, ‘cause frankly, the ones listed in this
article that Abercrombie & Fitch added…they umm…suck.
Study: Children's TV Studded With Dark
Acts
By DAVID
BAUDER, AP Television Writer
Children's
television is studded with violence, much of it darker and more realistic than
when Road Runner dropped an anvil on Wile E. Coyote's head, a watchdog group
reported on Thursday.
The Parents
Television Council analyzed 444 hours of kids' daytime programs last summer and
detailed 2,794 violent incidents, even after sifting out 'cartoony' moments.
That's 6.3 incidents an hour - more than the PTC found in prime time aimed at
adults during a 2002 study.
Programs
like 'Teen Titans' on the Cartoon Network and ABC Family Channel's 'Mighty
Morphin Power Rangers' often feature intense fights with swords, guns and
lasers, the group said.
It detailed
a scene on Fox's 'Shaman King' where two characters have a lengthy sword fight.
One character is knocked out by a blow to the head, and his opponent reaches
into the chest of his screaming rival and pulls out his 'soul,' leaving him dead.
There's
nothing wrong with fanciful, fantasy violence, said Brent Bozell, PTC founder.
'I grew up with `Tom and Jerry' and I think I'm OK,' he said.
'Popeye
beat up Bluto and you cheered,' he said. 'That was perfectly fine. Now the
protagonists will be caught in dark, powerful, oftentimes scary scenarios where
there is hard violence.'
Violent
cartoons can increase children's anxiety, desensitize them or lead them to
believe that violence is more prevalent - and acceptable - in real life than it
really is, said Dr. Michael Rich, director of the Center of Media and
Children's Health at Harvard University's medical school.
Children
under age 8 are cognitively unable to distinguish between real and fantasy
violence, he said. Rich studied reactions to the Sept. 11 terrorist attacks and
found children much less upset than their parents, perhaps because they
couldn't distinguish it from what they saw on TV regularly, said Rich, who
endorsed the study.
'They will
tell you it's only make-believe,' he said. 'The responses they have to it are
exactly the same as the real-life information.'
The PTC
cited the Cartoon Network as having the most violent incidents. The watchdog
group also criticized the ABC Family Channel while praising the Disney Channel
as the least violent network; both are owned by the Walt Disney Co.
Fox and
NBC, with more live-action children's shows, scored low on the violence meter.
The Cartoon
Network, in a statement, said that 'we are confident that our standards and
practices policies ensure that the programming on our air is age-appropriate.
All of our shows undergo several reviews throughout the production process to
make sure they are suitable for their intended viewers.'
The
watchdog group also criticized networks for coarsening the dialogue with potty
humor and mean-spirited name-calling. There's also been a trend toward
mimicking movies in including double-entendres so shows will appeal to both
children and adults, their report said.
Rich said
he didn't expect critical reports like this to change the industry's habits.
Only if parents become more aware and reject violent shows will the industry
listen, he said.
'This
should be the age of utter innocence for a child,' Bozell said. '
By JOHN
FLESHER, Associated Press Writer
Principal
Mike Smajda was horrified to learn that one of his first-grade pupils at
Not long
afterward, the boy was playing in a leaf pile with a girl when he suddenly
began kicking her in the head. Another boy joined in.
'They felt
it was part of the game,' Smajda said. 'They both kicked her until her head was
bleeding and she had to go to the hospital.'
Smajda
can't prove the R-rated slasher movie provoked the child. But the November 2004
incident reinforced his commitment to an anti-violence program getting under
way at his school.
It
challenged students to do without TV and all other screen entertainment for 10
days, then limit themselves to just seven hours a week. The district's other
schools joined in over the next year.
Administrators
and teachers say short-term results were striking: less aggressive behavior
and, in some cases, better standardized test scores.
Officials
in the
Designed by
child health specialists at
'I don't
know of any other school district that has gone as far with this,' said Lt.
Col. David Grossman, a former
More than
1,000 studies have established a connection between violent entertainment and
youthful aggression, but other factors such as family breakdown and peer
influence might share the blame, the
The
Stanford researchers wanted to determine whether significant cutbacks in
television and video would make children less prone to violence. A trial run of
their program in
'I can't
speculate on every individual violent act, but we do know that exposure to
violent content does cause more aggressive behavior overall and that reducing
screen time does reduce aggression overall,' research team leader Dr. Thomas
Robinson told The Associated Press by e-mail.
Smajda
announced the TV turnoff during an assembly at Lemmer Elementary in Escanaba, a
Lake Michigan shoreline town of 13,000 where lounging in front of the tube
rivals snowmobiling and ice fishing as means of coping with long, bitter
winters.
'Oh my
lord, I thought they were going to chase me out of the gym,' he said, recalling
the boos and hisses. Still, about 90 percent of the 400-plus students took part
to some extent.
'It was so
boring, it was miserable,' said 9-year-old Sydney Hardin, who nevertheless
stuck with the program - as did sisters Sara, 13, and Emily, 5.
They found
other things to do: reading, playing outside with friends, riding bikes. As
other schools got involved, the community pitched in. The YMCA offered free
temporary memberships; the city library organized card games and knitting
classes.
At Rhonda
Walker's home, TV screens went dark and video games with even mild violence
were outlawed for her sons, ages 6 and 10. Since then, the older boy's reading
has improved and the family does more things together.
'We just
played 'Clue' for an hour last night because they want to spend time with me,'
Observers
charted aggressive playground incidents - shoving, hitting, obscene gestures,
name calling - at eight elementary schools immediately before and after the
program. The totals dropped at every school but one. Overall average decline:
52 percent.
The
district also compared scores of fourth-graders who took standardized tests
during the turnoff in January 2005 with scores of fourth-graders tested before
the turnoff. Math and writing scores made double-digit leaps.
'Even more
positive results than we'd hoped for,' said Kristine Paulsen, the district's
general education director.
But will
they last? Robinson, the Stanford researcher, is studying his program's
long-term effects in
Smajda
plans to continue the program at his school, but says its success will depend
more on what happens at home.
'We're
trying to educate parents to monitor what their kids are watching,' he said.
'Many of them don't have a clue.'
Parents Pivotal in Keeping Teens
Away From Drugs, Reveals New Data
Drug,
Alcohol, Cigarette Use, and Sexual Activity Prevalent in
WASHINGTON,
Feb. 28 /PRNewswire/ -- Parents are a powerful influence in keeping their teens
off of drugs and other risky behaviors, such as underage drinking, cigarette
use, and sexual activity. And according to new data, the majority of teens say
the greatest risk in using marijuana is upsetting their parents (69%), followed
by losing the respect of friends and family (67.2%). To better help parents
prevent all types of risk-taking among teens, the White House Office of
National Drug Control Policy (ONDCP), and health and prevention leaders have
partnered to raise awareness about the consequences of risky behaviors among
teens, including drug use, drinking, smoking, and sexual activity.
Compared to
a generation ago, most of today's teens are thriving. Drug, alcohol, tobacco, and
teen pregnancy rates are all down. But recent surveys show that among the
Nation's 12-17-year-olds, each day 3,430 try marijuana for the first time;
7,500 try alcohol; 3,900 try cigarettes; and one in five teenage girls has at
least one birth by age 20. In a typical high school class in
Research
shows that teens who have a positive relationship with their parents are less
likely to engage in risky behaviors:
-- Positive relationships or connectedness
between parents and
adolescents is linked to avoidance or
lower use of alcohol, tobacco,
and illicit drugs;
-- Adolescents who have high-quality
relationships with their parents are
less likely to initiate sex or be
sexually active;
-- Teens whose parents use a
"balanced" parenting style -- are warm, and
involved, firm in setting limits, and
show respect for their teen --
do better in school, report less
depression, and anxiety, have higher
self-esteem and self-reliance, and are
less likely to engage in all
types of risky or problem behavior,
including drug and alcohol use,
sex, or violence.
"We're
here to tell parents they are not alone. Research tells us there are some
straightforward steps parents can take not only to help prevent drug use, but
to reduce risk-taking across-the-board," said John Walters, Director of
National Drug Control Policy. "We think parents and caregivers will find
the information on how to monitor their kids practical and useful in their
everyday lives."
More info
at http://www.mediacampaign.org .
…See…parents
DO make a difference. Makes no sense to
say to yourself, “hey, why bother – they don’t listen to me”. WRONG!
Your kids DO listen to you and this shows it. There’s still a long way to go, with one in
three kids sexually active in High School..scary stats, here. This is where building trust with your kids
is so important. Takes work, and I’m
already finding that out with a 5-yr-old!
A friend of
mine told me a story about his grown
daughter, she’s 25 – and he still has to step in and ‘be the parent’
sometimes. It’s a lifetime commitment,
people.
'Virtual' Visits Pushed in Several
States
By ANN
SANNER, Associated Press Writer
Divorce put
David List and his 2-year-old daughter on opposite sides of the
She hasn't,
though. List's divorce agreement guaranteed him 'virtual visitation' - the
chance to talk with his daughter through an Internet video connection - and he
and Ruby Rose, now 5, usually connect at least twice a week. The chats sustain
them in between their in-person visits, which come only a few times a year.
'When she
gets off the plane, I know what she had for dinner last night,' said List, 49,
of
Advocates
of virtual visitation want states to spell out in their laws that judges can
make it part of a divorce agreement.
The
benefits go beyond helping parents and children stay close, supporters argue.
They say noncustodial parents are more likely to pay child support regularly if
they can stay in touch, and electronic visits can help keep children from
getting caught up in fights when bickering exes meet in person.
'A
telephone can only go so far,' said Republican state Rep. Ruth Munson of
The idea
has its critics, though, who fear judges might use the option of virtual
visitation as justification for ordering fewer real visits with children or
letting one parent move away with the children.
'Real
parents need real time. Real kids need real time,' said David L. Levy, director
of the Children's Rights Council.
'It can be
a wonderful accessory, but the danger is that it will be used as a substitute
for real visitation.'
Virtual
visitation agreements can cover things as mundane as telephone calls, e-mail
and instant messages, but the focus is on video connections. With the
technology becoming more commonplace and affordable, divorce lawyers say more
parents are using it, often without any formal court agreement.
But many
lawyers and judges are still unaware of it.
'I think
that it is an evolution and, unfortunately, a lot of older attorneys aren't
even aware that it is an option,' said Cheryl Hepfer, president of the American
Hepfer said
she has seen cases where virtual visitation helped keep the peace between exes
because seeing the child's face eased the absent parent's fear that the child
was being manipulated or monitored. She also called it 'common sense' that
parents using virtual visitation would be more willing to pay child support.
'In my
experience, I have found that parents who feel connected to their children are
much more invested and much more gracious,' Hepfer said.
While most
judges already can authorize virtual visitation, they hesitate to order it
because it's not addressed in the laws, experts said. Lawyers can be reluctant
to fight for it for the same reason.
'Lawyers
have tried. It's very hard,' said Jeffrey Leving, a divorce lawyer in
For the
last two years, he and Saige, now 6, have used Webcams to talk.
'I saw her
first loose tooth. I saw her haircut, new outfits - things you want to see on a
daily basis but you can't in person because you're a divorced parent,' Gough
said.
His divorce
attorney, Joyce Maughan, said
Gough moved
to
'This is
one way that helps make sure that technology keeps up with the needs of parents
who need to stay in contact with their children,' said Vos, a Republican.
Gough, 42,
said he is working to get other states to pass similar laws and has launched a
Web site, http://www.InternetVisitation.org, to spread the word.
…I dunno
about this one. I mean I think its great
that the technology helps bridge the gap between broken families, but I worry
about the courts using this as a crutch and not a real solution. www.sharedparentingworks.org
is a great starting point for working out a ‘parenting plan’ with your ex
before the court does it for you. Just
because the marriage ends doesn’t mean you’re not a parent anymore.
[Cue Song 1 Stingray – “Get On It”]
[Cue Mailtime]
Listener
Mail: Wow nearly an empty mailbag this
week…is spring break already here?
Comments, suggestions, empty praise or heavy criticism, please send to
SUBMIT at 101 uses for baby wipes dot com.
Teri, the
Feminist for fathers, checked in with this little news item;
When I
first introduced you to Karl Hindle in September he was frantically searching
for his missing daughter Emily. Emily has been found, and Karl has been
enjoying unsupervized reunification visits with her, but this story doesn't
have a happy ending yet. Karl continues to deal with false allegations of
abuse, he doesn't have custody of Emily yet, and the people (and government
agencies) who kept his daughter from him have not been punished.
Now I
noticed Karl put a pushpin in my frappr map back in December, with a shout-out
about searching for his daughter in the
I need to
check with Teri and get her take on this webcam visitation article, too.
Chris from
the Financial Aid Podcast sent over the promo I played. So go register and try to win one of those
cool prizes!
Greg wrote
in asking what gods I ticked off, with the power outage last week and the
server being down. Yeah, just comes in
threes I guess. First, no power, next –
no server, then no time to get the show recorded and uploaded. Sorry guys, I was not PODFADING – just
couldn’t get the show done without some serious 110VAC, y’know?
One weird
thing I should mention…the daddycast was featured on the Yahoo podcast page,
and in fact the show was a staff pick for about 2 weeks last month. Then, mysteriously, the show wasn’t there
anymore. Yahoo had to pull it, since
their search function returned some snide error message, “Hmm…we don’t find any
shows with 101 uses for baby wipes” but
here are some episodes. Of course the
episodes listed are other podcasts that’ve played my promo or mentioned this
show on their website – but this show was a big fat black hole! Why was this such a big deal? Yahoo podcasts is how I tell my mom to go
listen to the show – go to yahoo podcasts, and search for “101 uses” and click
on listen. So when the show disappeared,
I lost my #1 fan! Well, all of a sudden,
its back on their listings again! Go
figure.
[Cue Wipes Use #42 – “Barber Shop
Buddy”]
Its nice to
have a barber as a personal friend, especially when my kid is so out-of-control
in a hair salon – er – barber shop – er – whatever – that he just will not hold
still long enough to get one lock of hair cut, let alone the whole head.
So my
friend Mark comes in on a Sunday, and opens up the shop, just to cut my
family’s hair, which is really appreciated.
God help me if I miss the appointment, though! The reason Evan, my son, won’t hold still is
the fact that hair salons – er – barber shops – whatever – make him twitch with
itchy anticipation. The cut hairs that
make their way down his back or inside his shirt collar just freak him out. He’s incredibly ticklish (like my wife –
which can be fun at times) so he goes into this psychosomatic twitchy dance
whenever we go to the salon – er – shop – to get trimmed up.
I mean,
just put that apron around his neck and he’s jumping around like the chair he’s
sitting in is electrified! And since my
son is very picky about his hair (he says he already has a girlfriend) we can’t
have him so out of control that Mark the barber could slip and accidently
Mohawk my little boy’s coiff!
Solution:
Baby Wipes of course! See, if you wipe
down his neck before the haircut, and then occasionally during the session, he
doesn’t get all twitchy and itchy, ‘cause it doesn’t itch. Pychosomatic?
Don’t care. I don’t want my son
to be folically challenged like his old man because of some slip of the
grooming shears!
[Cue Song 2 The Sketches – “Fly Baby
Right Now”]
Here Comes
The Toontest!
[Cue ToonTest 43+44]
ToonTest Answers:
#3 – Dastardly & Mutley, #2 – Dragon Ball Z, #1 – Yugi-Oh DX
Now all of
these cartoons are rated TV-Y7, but Dragon Ball Z and Yugi-Oh are just too over
the top for me to let my son watch ‘em.
Dastardly & Mutley goes back a long way…it was a spin-off of the old
‘wacky races’ cartoon series, and that was the voice of the late great Paul
Winchell you heard in that Toontest.
Anime is really taking over children’s television. In
[Cue Alien Break 3a]
[Cue Alan Jay_Time]
[Cue Song #3 Lost In